Milkbone Underwear: Exploring Cheers and The Evolution of Ted Danson's Hair

Coach: How's Life, Norm? Norm: Not for the squeamish, Coach. This episode resonates with me for two reasons. I love charades, and the slow decline of the game as a party starter bums me out. And I LOVE My Dinner with Andre, so Diane's sad stab at rousing some sleepy accountants by acting out the movie's title makes my heart sing. My Dinner with Andre's become a bit of a highfalutin punchline, popping up in The Simpsons, Community, and this scene from Christopher Guest's classic, Waiting for Guffman: Andy Kaufman even made a whole movie based around the same structure, right down to Satie's classical score, co-starring that great philosopher, "Classy" Freddie Blassie: And here's a clip of Wally Shawn dashing my dreams of an Andre sequel: Airing just one year after Andre's release, I'm guessing Cheers might've made the first pop culture reference to that great flick. Whatever happened to toga parties? I was never a fr...

Coach: How's life treating you, Norm? Norm: Like he caught me in bed with his wife. Ken Levine and David Isaacs give us a glimpse of what might've been with Newhart's Julia Duffy guesting as Diane's old friend from school. Duffy was in the running for the role of Diane as originally conceived as Sam's executive boss--the same dynamic they later used with Rebecca Howe after Diane's departure--and even the character's name, Rebecca Prout, rings awfully familiar. Rebecca's in town looking for some rebound action to blot out the memory of her cheating fiancé. Specifically, she wants a man from "peasant stock, tall, dark, strong, with hairy arms", and entirely non-intellectual, for "an evening of unbridled bestial pleasure. I want to burn at the stake of passion." Enter Sam. Diane feigns shock, "who, the gay guy with the war wound?" to throw her friend off Sam's scent, but Rebecca's not buying it, and Diane...

The Gang: Norm!  Diane: Norman. Norm: Gentlemen, start your taps.  Only five episodes in, and The Coach's Daughter offers maybe the sweetest moment in the whole series' run. I've been staring at this screen for far too long trying to find the right words to give Nicholas Colasanto and Allyce Beasley proper credit for what they do here, and I got nuthin'. Taxi alum, Ken Estin, writes what would be a nice average episode until the final act when he gives us a stunning moment of tenderness between a father and daughter, and...ah, hell, I can't even. I'm a puddle. Just watch it. Or re-watch it! Coach's daughter, Lisa (Moonlighting's Beasley), visits, introducing her fiance, Roy, and Coach's worst fears are realized times ten when he meets the guy. Roy wastes no time offending everyone, and it's obvious he's only marrying Lisa to advance his career in the lucrative field of door-to-door suit sales. Coach demands Lisa dump the schmuc...

Coach: "How's life treating you, Norm?" Norm: "Like I just ran over its dog" So many firsts in this episode! Here we get the first of six appearances by Night Court's Harry Anderson as flimflam man, Harry "The Hat" Gittes, and the first of three by Sam's old baseball/skirt-chasing colleague, Dave Richards. We also get our first Sam/Diane kiss, albeit a non-consensual one. Sam used to plant wet ones on unsuspecting women way too often, and it's only through a modern lens I'm realizing how inappropriate and unacceptable it all was! But handsome Danson's so lovable in the role, it's hard to hold it against him. As a kid, two of my main obsessions pre-Alyssa Milano were magic and pranks, so a con man like Harry made my heart sing! Thirty-seven years later, he's probably still my favourite recurring barfly--his scarcity only lending esteem to his legend. In the cold open, Coach proves an easy mark for Harry until Sam ...

Coach: "How you doin', Norm?" Norm: "Cut the small talk and gimme a beer." Check out that first shot of the cold open as the camera starts bar-level and swings up and around to a cackling Coach! James Burrows at the top of his milieu-setting game. Carla's crazy-crusty after a crushing loss for her beloved Red Sox and Yankee fan, Big Eddie, pushes his luck by pushing her buttons. Diane drops some serious culture on Eddie, debating New England v New York, but Ed's rude 'tude ruins her mood, too. Once Eddie starts in on Sam ("Sam 'Maybe' Malone"), Carla cracks and straight up assaults the guy. While he had it coming, Ed insists Sam fire Carla or vows he's "gonna take everything you got!" Sam gives Carla one more chance to play nice, so she gets some anger management and manages to weather a ridiculous barrage of insults from Ed. Satisfied with Carla's newfound zen, and more than a little frustrated with his inabil...

Coach: "Beer, Norm?" Norm: “Hey, I've heard of that stuff. Better give me a tall one in case I like it.” The first and possibly only appearance of horny Norm! Vera doesn't have a name yet, but Norm's wife is briefly mentioned in the first episode, and Norm's confirmed as 100% faithful in season 2, resisting the considerable charms of Alf's Anne Schedeen, but here's Norm going gaga for a leggy blonde named Brandee "with two e's". While I like this excitable side of Norm--note the chummy way he greets Carla ("Hey, girl!")--I'm glad they didn't stick with this approach as Sam's hound enough for the whole bar. And right on cue, Sam swoops in offering 'Brandee' ("with two 'e's") an "amusing little wine", much to Diane's disappointment, as she was operating under the assumption Sam had more depth. While Sam and Diane debate his taste in women, Brandee gets antsy and leaves with ...